teaching lying

Sometimes the words that come from my children truly convict me in my parenting. Recently has been no different, but it has been a particular something… more than just random willfulness or selfishness.

The other day 2 of my girls were playing nicely, politely… and then I heard one utter something like: “but do you PROMISE” to do or not do such/such…

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I took this opportunity to instruct, though I am not sure how much stuck. 🙂

What are we teaching our children when they have to ‘promise’ in order for another to believe what they have said to be true?

We are teaching them to lie.

Sadly, but plainly and simply, we are telling them that you do not have to speak the truth unless you make it a promise!

We are taught in Scripture: …but let your yea be yea; and your nay, nay; lest ye fall into condemnation. James 5:12

Indeed, this phrase is prefaced by a plea to NOT swear/promise by anything. Then it states that our word should simply be kept, thus reliable.

I do not make it a habit of asking my children to “promise” to do anything… but they have frequently asked me to promise that what I tell them is true. I try to make sure they realize that if what I am telling them were not true… it makes my words lies.

I rarely promise them anything.

I either speak truth, or I speak a lie.

We must instruct our children to only speak truth.

If it is unkind, then it is best left unsaid, something we are still learning/teaching! 🙂

But if someone is asking them to promise, they need to know how to let them know that “you do not practice lying to your friends, but you will not promise.”

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There are several ways our Lord speaks of lying, but mostly it is called lying, deceitful or false lips or speaking falsely.

And here are some verses to help our children and us understand how God views lying:

Thou shalt destroy them that speak leasing [lies]: the LORD will abhor the bloody and deceitful man. Psalm 5:6

Mine eyes shall be upon the faithful of the land, that they may dwell with me: he that walketh in a perfect way, he shall serve me. He that worketh deceit shall not dwell within my house: he that telleth lies shall not tarry in my sight. Psalm 101:6,7

These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, An heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren. Proverbs 6:16-19 [mentioned twice in this list!]

Lying lips are abomination to the LORD: but they that deal truly are his delight. Proverbs 12:22

God does not want us to speak  lies!

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And some verses to help our children understand how God views truth:

LORD, who shall abide in thy tabernacle? who shall dwell in thy holy hill? He that walketh uprightly, and worketh righteousness, and speaketh the truth in his heart. Psalm 15:1,2

 The lip of truth shall be established for ever: but a lying tongue is but for a moment. Proverbs 12:19

Lying lips are abomination to the LORD: but they that deal truly are his delight. Proverbs 12:22

For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile: Let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it. I Peter 3:10

These are just a few thoughts I’ve had recently when teaching my own precious babes on the importance of speaking truthfully!

We are ALL a work in progress 🙂 I would encourage you to study it out a bit on your own, as there are a myriad of other verses in which we are told how much God hates lying and loves the truth!

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Blessings!

 

 

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